Here's Why We Need A National Health Care Plan

I'm sure I'm not the only person my age who has recently become acquainted with a CPAP machine.  For those who don't know, it keeps old, fat guys like me breathing through the night so Sleep Apnea doesn't kill us.  Chances are, if you snore, and you're spouse complains about it, you have Sleep Apnea, too.

And to defend old, fat guys?  I have a friend who runs triathlons, is much younger than me and found himself falling asleep in his car at stop lights during the day.  He's got a CPAP machine now, too.

They have a machine that forces air into your lungs all night and you either have a thing that goes over your nose, or as I do, one that covers your face like a fighter pilot's face mask.  And they have parts, and the parts wear out, and need to be replaced.

But the whole thing is a scam.  Not that Apnea is a scam, it's real.  But the way the home health industry treats you when you have it?  Total scam.

When I was told I needed one of these machines about a year and a half ago, I went to IHC Home Health Care to get one.  I had checked with PEHP, and they said that, yes it was covered, and that they would pay for me to buy one.

But IHC HHC would only RENT me one.  They said that since most people only used it for a few months and then turned it in, the chose to rent them for a YEAR at $80 month, and then if you wanted to keep it?  They would sell it to you.

Nice idea.  You have just made about a thousand dollars extra off a machine that costs about $3K and you haven't even SOLD it yet!  And at the end of the year, you get to sell a USED machine, for full price!  Brilliant!  And insurance companies are OK with this?

I told the guy at IHC that, no, I figured I'd need this thing the rest of my life, and I just wanted to buy it right now, because my PEHP insurance was about to run out, and I wouldn't be able to buy it in a year without buying it all on my own.

He became very flustered.  People in the health care industry, when actually asked qesestions, especially by people who HAVE insurance, who NEVER ask qestions, tend to get fucked up by it.

"No one has ever asked to do this before.  I'll have to go ask my boss about this.  I'll be right back."

No he wouldn't.  After 45 minutes I got up and walked out.  I told the receptionist that she shouldn't keep my appointment open, my salesman now had an, "opening" and I didn't like their customer service.  Time to find a new provider.

Your doctor, when you have a sleep disorder, won't just give you a copy of your diagnosis, and a copy of your prescription for the machine, and the way it should be set up.  You have to go back to his office and have him fax it to who you want to do business with.  Like it's top secret.

Next stop, Apria Health Care that used to be over by Fashion Place Mall.  They were very helpful.  Assured me that they would indeed be happy to NOT rent me the machine and bill my insurance company for the cost to BUY the machine.  They set everything up, gave me the paperwork, sent me on my way and almost immediately, my wife said I was not keeping her up all night with my snoring.  Mission Accomplished.

And then, Apria Health Care sent me a monthly rental bill for eight months.

These bastards will lie through their teeth, and hope you don't notice, and will just pay it.  They have no scruples.

I finally, after numerous calls to PEHP, who swore they were billed for rentals, not a buy had to get ugly with a woman in the Apria office.  I MADE them take me to their billing person.  Took my little note pad and pen, took down her name off of her desk and told her, and you who know me, know what kind of language I used, so I'll spare you here, that if she didn't re-bill this debacle, and get it straight before the next bill came, I would first call, "Get Gephardt" (this was when THAT still meant something) and personally embarrass her and her company, but now that I was going to include her on the lawsuit, she would be liable because it was obvious that she, "knew, or should have known" that there was a problem.

Cleared that shit up right away.

Fast forward to this morning.  I wake up, and the rubber, "gasket" that goes between the hard plastic face mask, and my ACTUAL face, has a hole in it.  It keeps a tight fit on your face, so the air and vaporized water being forced into your lungs ends up there, instead of all over your pillow.  Can't be more than a $5 piece of soft rubber.  So I'll drive over to Apria, and get another one.  Should take about a minute.

Oh, was I wrong.  It appears I don't learn well from my own experience.

First off, the surly receptionist informs me that they can ORDER that part and I will have it in about three days.  Great.  Guess I'll just spent the next three days at Starbucks?  Cause sleep is out of the questions.  I asked her, "What am I supposed to do for three days?  You don't stock these parts in your warehouse?"

She goes into the company spiel, "To stock every little part we would need a huge warehouse (Yeah?  So what?  DO go on!), there are thousands of masks.  Let me see if your eligible for a new mask."

I don't WANT or NEED a new mask!  I need a new, little piece of soft rubber that was made to fit MY mask!  And how do you have available, any size of WHOLE mask, but not the parts to fix ONE that needs some attention?

And she says, "It's going to take an hour to confirm your insurance.  But you are eligible for a new mask."

I asked her, "Then I can take my mask and you'll bill me?"

What was I thinking?  Nope.  I have to make my co-pay before I get a new mask.

Then it hits me.  They don't make much profit on a $5 replacement part.  But if they can bill my insurance for a WHOLE new mask?  Ka-Ching!

You wonder why we have the 37th, "best" health care in the world, and we pay MORE for it than anyone else?  Here's why.  Pay attention.

I went into this place in need of a piece of rubber that couldn't have cost $5.  But because of the way we do business in this country, I walked out of there with a new mask,  just so I could sleep tonight and Apria Health Care had billed my insurance company, $155.30 and gotten a, $38.83 co-pay out of ME!

No problem, Mr. Stickley, we have your credit card on file.  Would you like us to bill it?

THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT!

You think I was better served?  You think I SAVED money?  You think I'm healthier?  You think the replacement part was the problem, and that's really WHY they don't stock them?  Then you think stupid.

This is the equivalent of buying a new SUV because you had a flat tire, or the windshield wipers wore out!

Where have I heard this before?  Oh, yeah.  The Iraq War, where, Halliburton would buy new SUV's for THEIR people for exactly THOSE reasons, because they had a, "Cost Plus" contract.  Meaning they got X amount of money for their services, PLUS the cost of providing them.  No matter how many new, GM SUV's they went through.

And that, boys and girls, it why we don't have a national health care plan in this country.  It would cost rich people too much money!