Stupid stuff

One stupid thing I witnessed, one I DID today. No politics, no sports. Just observations of life. What, George Carlin used to call, "OH, Yeah!" humor. Meaning, you had been there and done that.

Today I write a check to pay my Visa bill at my local credit union. I'm very sure to write the name of the CU on the line, the right date, and on the, "money" line, I write, "One thousand, one hundred and ...." and I double check it. Because I've written a check to my wife where I MEANT to write, "six hundred dollars" and wrote, "Six and 00/100 Dollars" just being in a hurray.

On the memo line I write, "Account # 4********* VISA PAYMENT". That, should, about cover it.

When I pull up to the drive up window, the nice young lady says to me, "What can I do for you today?" And my answer is, and I speak, English pretty well, "Just making a Visa Payment." And I send the check through the tube. WHOOSE!

Not a minute later, she says, "You wanted this in savings?" I shit you not. Now, I know these folks are busy, but, "did you READ the check?" WTF?

So I say to her, "No, it's to go on the fifth race at, Hollywood Park. Bet it all on, "She's A Dumb ass" to, SHOW!"

I felt like, Bill Engval. "Here's Your Sign".

"Yes, Visa Payment. Please."

Not ten minutes later. It's fading between sunlight, and overcast in the Salt Lake Valley today. I'm wearing a zip up, "REDWINGS" hoodie, and sunglasses. Black, driving gloves. And just as I pull up to the liquor store, the snow starts to blow again, so I pull the hoodie up over my head just before I ENTER the liquor store.

Oh, what, was, I, thinking? Every employee in there takes one look at me, and their next look is to the nearest, "panic button alarm".

I pull of the hood as quick as possible, and say, "Hey! How are ya?" to the employees I see in there all the time, and the Cops did NOT show up and have me, "Felony Prone" when I came out. Pretty dumb for a guy who USED to BE a COP! Walk into a liquor store like a guy who was there to rob it!

What was I thinking?

We all make mistakes. I'll try to be a little more tolerant of bank tellers, if the folks at the liquor store won't have me shot. Just sayin...