Aloha Welker DeYoung Is About To Die.

I met my wife in a bar.  With a bunch of friends from Youth Corrections and The Juvenile Court.  I didn't know her background until after we started to date.

We got together every other Friday, Payday Friday at, David's Uptown on Main.  We called it, "The Weekend Attitude Readjustment Seminar".

And I didn't meet her parents until we got married.  They still lived in California.

When we went down there a month or so after getting married, we stayed at their house, and they had a reception for us.  Her dad and I played golf.  He kept telling me it was OK if I had a beer.  Truth be known, I usually prefer ice tea when golfing, and that's what I drank.

But her mother was, after asking one of her sisters when we started dating if I was a Mormon, totally accepting of her Gentile son in law.

She was nothing but wonderful to me, and our children.  She was the most loving, and accepting person I have ever known.  She loved her Gay grandson with no reservation.  She could find no fault with anyone.  Unless they didn't like the Utah Jazz or the San Francisco 49's.

She even rooted for the Utes since I went there.  I'm not sure it made my wife, the BYU graduate happy, but she lived with it.

She was told for the last 40 years that all the cancer and other problems were going to kill her.  She might have said it much more nicely than I will, but she pretty much told, Death to, "fuck off!" for that entire time, and continued to live.  Despite all the doctors that said she would not.

She was the anchor for her whole family.  All her kids and all THEIR kids.  The could always count on Grandma DeYoung.  She was the rock.

Now?  Not so much.  She's, "circling the drain", and it's not a pretty sight.  But it's not her fault.  She's 89 years old.

Deb says that earlier tonight, she tried to pull of her colostomy bag, and wanted to go for a walk.  She hasn't walked in at least a year.  So this is no way for a wonderful woman to go out.  On drugs and not knowing what's going on.  I'm glad I got to talk to her again this afternoon, even if only for a minute before she faded out again.

She is absolutely convinced that there is an after life.  And that as soon as she goes, she is going to be reunited with her husband, and she can't wait for that.  She's missed him the last few years.  She wants to be with him again.

And I hope she's right.

And I want her to do that.  Because this life is long and painful sometimes.  And sometimes?  We live too long.

I'm going to miss you, Mom.  You were wonderful to me.  I love you so much.  Thank you for being so accepting of me, and my ways, that were so different from yours.  You never questioned, you never scolded.  You just accepted.  And loved.

Have a good trip.  We're all going to miss you.  And never, ever forget you.

I'll be happy to write a serious obituary for you, leaving out my opinion.  But I just had to say what I was thinking.  Not everyone can say they love their Mother In Law.  I sure did.