Anger Management

I threw MYSELF out of a soccer game yesterday afternoon.

I've become quite the mellow parent over the last few years. I'm a pretty big guy, and I have a really loud voice, so when a, Ref got pissed off at a game, I was usually the guy he would try to throw out, even if I didn't say anything. When we did search warrants, I was always the guy who would stand outside and yell, "POLICE, SEARCH WARRANT! GET ON THE GROUND, NOW!" Because I could be heard in the whole neighborhood.

So now, I limit my comments to stuff like, "Nice hustle, Murray! Good shot, Danny! Way to go, Jaden, good job! Stay with him!" Never anything negative.

Yesterday, I was doing the same, and my son scored a beautiful goal to give his team a 0-1 lead at home. And I thought the officials were doing a pretty good job, but I guess I wasn't seeing things the other parents were. They were getting on one of the, Linesmen for not calling offsides on the other team, as much as they thought he should be. This, Linesman, maybe about as old as our boys playing, really had radar, because he heard everything, and at one point, after halftime, ran out and told the official.

My son thinks the kid was the, Ref's son, but I have no confirmation of this. But from the, Ref's reaction, the kid was related, or the, Ref was his, Priest, and this kid was his favorite, Alter boy. Because the, Ref blew a gasket in his mind.

He came over and started yelling at the parents in the bleachers, that any more talk directed at his, Linesman would be met with ejection. And as soon as he did, the, Linesman, turned around to the bleachers and yelled either, "So SHUT IT!", or, "So SUCK IT!". I couldn't tell, but I had not said a word until then, and I looked at the yelling, Ref, pointed to his, Linesman, and said, "Who's inappropriate, now? You're going to let him talk to adults like THAT?".

The guy got COMPLETELY out of control. The veins in his neck were popping, and he was yelling at ME, "ONE MORE WORD, AND YOU'RE OUT OF HERE!" All the while, my friend, Alley is saying to him, in the most calm of tones, "Sir. May I ask you a question?" And about the 3rd time she said it, he threw her out of the park. Unbelievable!

He storms back onto the field, and one of the players mom's, turns to her friend, or it might have been a daughter, and says, not loud enough you could hear it if you weren't sitting within 10 feet of them, and totally joking, "That, Linesman needs a spanking."

The, Linesman herd it, and ran out to his, "dad", or whatever, and the, Ref comes back and demands, "Who said he needs a spanking!?". The woman who did it said, "I did." She wasn't thinking this asshole was going to throw her out. But he did.

Another parent in a lawn chair down the line said something to the effect of, "That's a little harsh." Ref threw him out, too!

By this time, the Murray guys are not in the game, they are worried about their mothers and fathers being thrown out of the game every couple of minutes, and end up losing, 5-1 by the end, but the game has gone from being about the kids, to being about this assholes ego being bigger than the park! Had I been the coach, I'd have just told the boys to go home, and made a complaint to the league, and let it stand as a loss. It was, at this time, no longer a soccer game, it was a zoo.

A few minutes later, the, Ref came over and gave one of our assistant coach's a yellow card. I don't know what, Andy said, but his guy didn't like it. So after scolding our coach, and giving him the card, Andy was being nice and said, "Thank you" to the, Ref, which I interpreted to mean, thank you for not throwing me out, and yelled at the boys, something to the effect of, "Let's go! Don't let this stuff distract you, get after it!" Ref gave him a red card. I shit you not, he threw him out.

By now, I've seen enough to know that this has become personal between this complete, Egomaniac who is officiating this game, and the entire town of, Murray. And he's going to make sure we don't win, and we feel so intimidated that we can't even root for our boys!

One of the other parents said something, and he threw THEM out, too! I've had enough, so I have to say something now. I wanted to punch this guy and is sissy boy, Linesman in the mouth, but I know better, so as the parent he's just, "tossed" is leaving, I got up and threw myself out.

I said to him, "Don't you EVEN think about telling me I'm thrown out! I'm leaving because I can't stand to watch you work any more. You suck! And your, Linesman? He's a whinny little bitch with, rabbit ears!" Then I walked about 20 steps to my car, and watched the rest of the game.

He didn't say shit to me. He knew he couldn't take me, and that I was about to try him if he opened his mouth.

I hate the fact that it has to come to this at a kids game. Yeah, some parents get on officials nerves, and they shouldn't. But if they aren't abusive, or nasty, and just disagree with the call, is that enough to throw them out? I don't think so.

And this group was calling, in my humble opinion, a pretty good game. You can always argue about the offsides call when you are in the bleacher's at the middle of the field, because you can't see what the, Linesman sees.

But the, Linesman needs to understand this, and just do his job. Not have, "Rabbit Ears" and get all upset. He's an official. Folks are not going to agree with him all the time. Get used to it, or get the hell out of the job!

For 23 years, I was a Cop, and as so, had to be held to higher standard. Like a, Referee. You know how many times I wanted to call someone, who had done something awful to a kid, or a vulnerable victim some name they deserved, but couldn't? Millions.

Now that I don't do that any more, I can say anything I want, as you've noticed if you read this blog! To ANYONE I want! Including former coworkers who don't get it. And I DO!

After the game, my son, who had come out just before I threw myself out and was on the sideline when I did, gave me a, "Faux News terrorist fist bump" because the, "Rabbit ears" comment made his teammates laugh. I'm OK with that. I stood up for him and his friends, and I didn't get in the guys face until he deserved it, and I didn't punch him. Which he deserved.

So, I might be the first, "Soccer DAD" to throw himself out of a soccer game, in history.

Now, since the, Ref wouldn't tell us his name, I'm going to the UYSA web site to find out who worked that game, and make a formal complaint. And this week, I'm going to buy a digital video recorder to tape all the games from here on out, so that if this happens again, I have a record of it.

It's a game. It's not about your ego. Get over it. And if you want to be in control of any situation, don't be a soccer, Ref. Be a COP! It's a lot harder, but you ARE in charge because you have the gun!