Epic Dog Day

And the only dog was mine.  But we had a bunch of people in, "The Garage Ma Hall" today.  Too many, well, "foreign" cigars.  Won't specify the country.  Don't want to get any one in trouble.

Good whiskey.

Jerry brought his dad, who's in his 70's.  He wanted to know what his son was doing down here on Friday and Sunday afternoons.  Pretty much siting around, smoking, "foreign" cigars and drinking while listening to southern rock music.

At one point his dad, Joe said to, Phil, "Do you think it would be OK if I smoked in here?"

Well the air was BLUE with cigar smoke.  At least four of us were smoking cigars.  What was I going to tell him?  NO!  You might make the Camaro cover smell like smoke, or something!

Every hour or so, we open both garage doors, and air out the place for a few minutes.  But I still take the rug from in front of the wood stove, and the Camaro's, "Lingerie Cover" to the cleaner every spring.

We had 11 people in there this afternoon.  Ryan says it's a record.  I don't keep count, so I'll take his word for it.

Good friends, good times and a great way to spend time with them.

The money I spent to build that place?  Worth every penny.

One Thing After Another

I went to visit my mom this morning.  Three weeks after her first, and by her own decision, ONLY chemotherapy treatment?  She's losing her hair.  How does that happen?

My bedroom smells bad.  In the fall, when it started to get cold, the kids said they saw a mouse in the basement.  No problem, not the first time.  We set traps and put out new poison.  After a few days, they said they didn't see the mouse any more.  None of the traps were sprung.  So I guess the poison worked and he went outside to die.

Not so fast.  The heating vent on my wife's side of the bedroom is NOT connected to the one on MY side of the bedroom.  And it stinks.  And you can't reach down into it far enough to clean it out.  I think we've found that mouse.  And I need to call the HVAC folks in the morning and hope they can come to check it out.

I stuffed HER heating vent with dryer sheets to stop the smell, but it's not doing that well.

A week ago, our high tech washer, that is only four years old, took a dump.  And despite the best efforts of Doyle's Appliance Repair, who would NOT take any money from us, and made at least eight trips here to try and fix it, was not repairable.  So I spent $1000 for a new washer, which I had not planed for, right before Christmas.

Then, the other night, my son backs his, "new car" which is his Grandmothers car, that he's taking care of until she can drive again (LOL!  Like THAT'S ever going to happen...) up next to the garage and leaves the wheels turned.  So I go out to take some stuff to the recycle bin, and I notice that even though the car only has 15K miles on it, the tires are showing wear bars!

I know they put shit tires on cars for original equipment, but only 15K miles and they are JUNK?  Really, Ford?  Wow.

So I come inside and order four new tires from costco.com, that will be delivered to the Costco here in Murray.  $350.

Man, when it rains it pours around here.

The Audi is due for a 75K service, which I have scheduled for next week.  This is a big one.  Probably cost me about $500, or more.  But you don't buy an Audi and IGNORE the service.  It's a luxury car.  You want to keep it one?  You have to pay the price.  Last month I put the fourth set of tires on it.  $750.

Pro rated, cause the last ones didn't last 43K miles, only 33K miles.  Saved me about $400 dollars.  Thank you, Costco Tire Center.

Tonight, while I was downstairs looking at the vent work to figure out where that damn mouse was.  I thought that I hadn't opened the gun safe in a year or more.  And I might check on it.  After all, my son assures me that there is a zombie apocalypse coming at any time.  And we will need those guns.  One of his friends the other day said when that happens, he's bringing HIS family over here, cause I have a gun safe full of guns.

Well, it's a good thing I did.  The battery was dead.  And it wouldn't open.  So I put a new one in.  Those zombies got some SHIT coming now!

Man, if we have any more shit to deal with between here and the end of the year?  I'm going to have my head explode.  Who has a dead mouse in their duct work?  How does that happen?  Shit.

I'm really looking forward to  2013.  It's GOT to better than THIS year.

It's Down To This

One day, my mom is doing great.  She's always all there mentally.  Physically?  Not so much.  She can't keep down solid food, so I'm buying her the fruit juice based, Boost on line since I can't find it here.

The cancer is kicking her ass.  It's pretty obvious, that she's, "circling the drain".  She actually said she would rather die than keep living like this.  Don't blame her.

On Friday, she was in great spirits, very upbeat, felt great.  Saturday I called her with the Bowl Game times and channel and she sounded great.  I didn't see her on Sunday and when I went to see her today?  She had a bad Sunday.  Soiled her clothes and her bed three times, couldn't eat, and felt lousy.

This disease is so day to day.  One day she's great, the next, she's awful.

The Hospice nurse thinks she won't make it until Christmas.  Some days I think she's right.  Other days?  Mom is doing really well.

Well, I won't be traveling anytime soon.  Not until this is over.  I have a three story condo to empty out and deal with.  And this is what you do, cause it's what you HAVE to do as a child.  You take care of your parents.

But when it's done?  I'm going to go away for a while.  Take the blind woman I live with to Belize for a while.  Or Mexico, or Paris, or Paros, I don't know.  Then I'll take a deep breath and sit down with my children and tell them how shitty it's going to be for THEM when their mother and I go.

So it goes.

Liar!

I'm beginning to wonder who the GOP stays upright under the weight of it's own stupidity.  Don't know what I'm talking about?  Pay attention.

I saw a woman drive by me in an SUV yesterday in a parking lot.  She had her Walmart name tag hanging for the rear view mirror and a Romney sticker on the back of the car.  This person does NOT get it.  If you're working at Walmart, and that's that's the best you can do?  Mitt Romney is NOT your candidate.  He wants to keep you as a part of the permanent underclass that he and his Capitalist buddies can hire for next to nothing, cause there are no GOOD jobs out there.

In the last few days, a woman who's a Teabagger leader in Texas said Obama fried his brain on drugs, which is why he needs a teleprompter.  Why is it that when Republican leaders use teleprompters, these nut balls can't seem to see them?  I see them.  EVERY politician worth his salt uses them.  Sarah Palin wrote on her hand.  You would rather have THAT I suppose?

And you Mormon, Utah, Republicans should be shouting this line down louder than anyone.  I've watched some of you Conference and every, single one of those old guys use a teleprompter when they give a speech.  And they are supposed to be telling you information that came directly from God's mouth to THEIR ear!  If anyone SHOULDN'T need a teleprompter its a prophet of God, telling you WHAT GOD says!

Obama is coming for your guns.  A northern Utah rancher was quoted using this line a few weeks ago in an article about why rural Utahan's didn't vote for Obama (if an article never needed to be written, it was THAT one.  Gee.  Who doesn't know the answer to that question?) and I have to say, based on what?  In what universe does the scary Black man had a pocket full off anti-gun legislation he's just waiting to cram down your throat in his second term?

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, because Republicans seem to be as immune to hearing this, as they are to seeing THEIR guys using teleprompters (could be the tin foil on their heads).  The only two pieces of legislation affecting guns that the President has signed allow you to NOW take a loaded gun into a National Park and onto an Amtrak Train.

Now, in light of the recent rash of silly shootings (Colorado last summer, the football player in Kansas City and Portland today) there will probably be some gun control legislation introduced, but the President won't do it.  And it probably won't help.  Especially in the Kansas City situation, as by every account the kid who killed his girlfriend then himself was a fine upstanding citizen who never had a felony and no one saw this coming.  He could have bought a gun legally, as he did, even with more restrictive gun laws.

Bob Costas might have been right about the effects of all those hits to the head, but I think he missed the boat on calling for gun control because of this.

Raising taxes on the rich will cost THOUSANDS of working poor their jobs.  I heard Mike Lee utter this nonsense on Channel 2 last week, and Rod Decker was too nice (or chicken shit) to call him on it.  It's just a giant lie.  No reputable economist would back this up.  It's the same bullshit that they tried to sell since the 80's as, "trickle down economics".  That the, "job creators" need lower taxes to create jobs.

If you believe this, have you read a newspaper since 2005?  Cause the Bush tax cuts did ANYTHING but create jobs.

We have the best health care system in the world.  No.  According to the World Health Organization, we have the 17th best health care system in the world.  Behind Cuba.  And now, having experience with both health systems, ours and Cuba's?  I'm going to go with Cuba for the average persons day to day health care.  You break your leg in Cuba?  You won't go broke getting it fixed.

I have great health insurance and I just got a bill for $2K for my little two and a half day stay in the hospital.  I can pay that.  But that's a chunk of change for someone working at Walmart and thinking they should vote for Romney.  Trust me.

Look folks, if you only get your news from, "faux news", if you don't read newspapers, if you don't pick up a book once in a while that you didn't buy at Costco?  You're going to stay dumb.  And you will believe all the crap above.  Don't.  It's all a lie.  And if you believe it?  You're dumb.

Senator Mike Lee Is Not Very Smart. Surprised? Not Much.

This week the Senate considered endorsing a United Nations Resolution, urging all countries to make facilities accessible to the handicapped and blind.  They voted it down.  And that was silly.

But what was even sillier, was WHY they voted it down.

Do you, Mike Lee, know WHAT the United Nations IS?  I mean, REALLY know?  Not that you think you know that they will impose a, "New World Order" on America.  Or that they will be the controlling power of the whole world if we let them.

Do you know that after WWII, a bunch of countries got together and decided that it would be a good idea if the countries of the world had a place to get together, and share information, grievances, concerns with each other in close proximity to each other?  That the whole world at the time, decided that the best place for that would be in New York City, USA should say something to you.

Have you ever seen the UN building in New York?  There are no windows on the sides.  This assures that no one gets a, "Corner Office" and thinks they are more special than other countries.  Did you also know that when it was formed, it was agreed among all countries that the USA (and we were the only country to get this exemption) would never, ever have it's armed forces, while engaged in UN approved/requested/imposed activities be under the CONTROL of commanders from ANY OTHER COUNTRY?  Did you know that, Mike Lee?  My money is on NO.  You did not.  You're not that smart.

Did you also know that while the UN was busy getting together to stop unjust wars and genocide in other countries, and feeding starving children with UNICEF and other programs, they always ASK us if we would help?  Because we have one of the few PERMANENT seats on the on the UN Security Council that decides defense issues?  I'm betting not.

Cause this is what I heard you saying the other day.  You voted AGAINST the UN Resolution (which has no binding power over the USA, which is pretty much recommending the same accommodations to the rest of the world as we made national law 20 years ago) because it might let the UN IMPOSE (Impose HOW?) UN mandates on the USA.

We already imposed these mandates on ourselves!  You ever see a handicapped parking place?  Are you mental?

Mike, you actually were caught on camera saying that voting for this would, "threaten US sovereignty".  How?  The UN does NOT have any impact on US Government.  And CAN'T!

Then later, caught on camera again saying one of the reason's you shouldn't vote for this is cause there is, "No enforcement clause" in it!  WTF?

You don't want it ENFORCED  the USA.  But another reason to vote against it is that it can't be ENFORCED!
I have to admit.  It shows you were a debater in high school.  Congratulations.

It also shows you were a BAD one!  That, "There is no enforcement clause in this bill" argument is the last argument of a guy who couldn't come up with anything better to win a debate.  I know.  I won state awards in Debate, was the President of the Debate Club at a GOOD high school, Murray.  And while in college, judged state debate meets.

Your contradictions are so silly as to be laughable.  Except, YOU'RE a SENATOR!  You're supposed to be SMART!  And you're not!  You're a complete idiot!

Yesterday (or was it Monday) I saw you on TV saying that if we raise taxes on the top 2% of earners, thousands of working poor would lose their jobs.  WTF?  That BS has been debunked for years by every economist with any degree from any school that isn't stupid.  You ever hear of a guy named Paul Krugman?  He's won a Nobel Prize in economics and he's pretty sure it won't work the way you think it will.  As a matter of fact?  He thinks you're stupid if you believe what you believe.

Of course you haven't read his books.  He's smart.  And reading anything by someone who's smart would make your brain hurt.  If in fact, you have one.


So, Mike you're voting against the UN Resolution to help the handicapped world wide makes your constitutes sure that the guys in the blue helmets won't be showing up to make sure you idiots who home school your kids won't have to (to quote, or better yet, paraphrase, Jon Stewart) build a ramp from your classroom/living room to the school cafeteria/kitchen to get lunch.

Mike, you're a moron.  And so is anyone who would vote for this idiot.

Won't Be Long Now

Went to see mom today.  The cancer has her stomach so distended.  It's pretty obvious that she's not long for this world.  She's all there mentally, but physically?  She can't hardly move.  And she can't get out of bed without help.

The doctors told us three months to a year.  I think three months is going to be a stretch.  I really don't think she's going to make the new year.  Let alone spring.

This is painful.  She was doing great until this past summer.  Then everything fell apart.  I guess I just do the best I can for her, and shit will happen, or not.  She is in the best place, with great care.

Hospice?  Please take over!

Man, I'm going to be an orphan!  Crazy.  You never think THAT will happen when you're growing up.

So it goes.

Mortality. Deal With It.

Took my mother from assisted living to get her first chemotherapy treatment this morning.  It's not going to help.  She's so full of cancer that they can't operate, and this is a long shot at best to make her live six months instead of three.

She's done.  And it comes as a great surprise.  She was totally healthy until the first of July this year, when she fell and couldn't get up.

She's in a great place.  Canyon Creek is awesome.  There staff is the best.  I had my dad there six years ago, and they treated him like royalty.  Even though he was a prick.

We come face to face with our OWN mortality when our parents die.  Hey, if the people who raised YOU can die?  And leave YOU all alone?  What hope is there for the rest of us?

Well, quite a lot, actually.  We have our spouses.  We have our progeny.  And after we are gone, we can only hope that they keep our memory alive.  Or not.  Might just be a pain in their ass.  Could go either way.

With my dad?  He was an asshole to me and my whole family.  I honored his wishes at his death, cause I was his only son.  Only child, I should have said.  Buried him where he wanted.  Bought him a nice tomb stone.  Even flew the whole family back to West Virginia to see the stone in place.

I went a LOT more out of the way for him, dead, than he ever went for me, alive.

In all the years I played football  and soccer in Murray?  He NEVER bothered to come to a game.  Prick.  Then when he was old, he wanted me to hang out with him?  Yeah, right.

My Mom?  Totally different story.  I'll spend as much time as I can with her.  I'm going to miss HER!

Today was the best day she's had in a long time.  Those IV's included one that dealt with her nausea, and some Benadrill.  So she was goofy all day.

The next few days?  We shall see.

Parents die.  They get sick.  But at least my mom has all her mind left right now.  And I just bought her a new LED TV for her bedroom at Canyon Creek so she can watch college football.  And an adjustable wall mount for it, so even though the bed won't raise up?  The TV will move for her!

So we got THAT going for us.

Getting old sucks.  Even though I like it better than the alternative.

I'm going to miss my mom.  This will be a new experience for me.  Didn't miss my father.  Deb has been so much help.

I guess we will all go through it.  So it goes...

The War ON Christmas? Or The War FOR Christmas?

Right wing nut balls, and pundits like the fine, Christian folks at Faux News have spent years telling us that the, "Liberal Media" has been waging a war on Christmas.  Even going to far as to tell  people that it's OK to say, "Happy Holidays" to folks if you want then to have a great Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years Eve, New Years Day!  Heathens!

Let alone if you thought your friends might be Jewish?  After all, we support Israel.  Just not THEIR winter Holiday.

Hypocrites.

But after enduring a whole month now, of dealing with, "Christmas" music/commercials/advertisements, that started before Halloween?  Who's waging war on, Christmas?  I would have to ask, why is, "The main stream media" waging war on Halloween/Thanksgiving before advertising, CHRISTMAS!

I'm just asking?

No one is trying to OUTLAW, Christmas!  Hell, if anything, it's come about a day earlier every year since I was a kid.  Now?  It's out of control.  In a few years?  you will be trading your unused fireworks for Christmas gift cards in JULY!

There is no war on Christmas!  There is nothing but a horrible, horrible expansion of, what used to be known as, "The Holiday Season".  Which used to start at Thanksgiving!

And it went from being my favorite times of the year, to the time I dread the most.  No NEW programs on TV.  Only holiday bullshit music on the radio.

Oh, the horror.

And my birthday is December 25.  THAT has sucked for going on 54 years.  Now?  Not so much. When I was a kid?  A LOT!

I share it with Jimmy Buffett.  I'd love to sit down and talk to him about it one day.

Some people would say with TWO prophets.  I would not.  I've SEEN, Jimmy Buffett. The other guy?  Nope.

So, Conservatives?  There is NO war on Christmas, except on Faux News.  Even Atheists like me?  We get sick of it, especially when it starts so early.  But we don't want to ban your annual, spending, bacchanal.  knock yourself out! 

Some of us just wish we didn't have to deal with it all the time, and that we could watch some new, "Daily Shows".  Just saying.

AMMO, AMMO, AMMO! Come On Down!

Yep, it's coming.  Any day now.  The President who has only signed TWO gun laws in his first FOUR years, the ones allowing you to take a gun onto an Amtrack train and into a National Park, is coming for YOUR gun!

And hey, having spent some time on Amtrack trains and in National Parks?  Boy, those are two places I want to be armed!  I don't know about you...

So get your ammo now.  I don't know what you were thinking that you didn't stock up MONTHS ago!  After all, this happened right after the Socialist, Kenyan, Muslim who's Christian Minister you hated during the campaign, won the LAST election!  I guess you guys thought that Romney actually had a chance?  Silly you.

Come on down to, "Less Crazy Than You, Jeffrey's Ammo Emporium"!  As a Liberal Democrat who kind of figured that Romney would lose 49 states, and you folks would go bat shit crazy, and I mean that in a, Michele Bachman way, I bought up all the ammo I could LAST year.

While you were figuring on a Romney win?  I was betting on you being out of your mind.  And as, "President Scary Black Guy" said to, "Too Mormon and Icky To Win" on election night?  "I won, you lost."  Time to pay the piper.

Whether you want .22 or 454 Express (to shoot that Republican ELEPHANT who lead you astray), I've got it all!  In my secret warehouse in Utah, it's stacked wall to wall, tree top tall.  I'll give you a 10% discount on handgun ammo.  Since the chances are, if you're buying THAT?  You are going to shoot yourself or a loved one.  And as a Liberal?  We LOVE having less of you around!  And without a National Health Care Plan?  Chances are, you won't make it.

This is my little sacrifice to save America.  After all, I'm nothing if not a Patriot!

So, send in our order, to, yourenutsandyoudon'tpayattentionyoudumbass@exploitingthestupid.com

I'll be happy to sell you any ammo you need.  $40 a bullet, two for $90.  Delivery as soon as your credit card clears.

All pick up orders at the secret location must be paid in cash only (yes, US Currency).  No personally minted gold or silver coins will be accepted.  I don't care WHAT the Utah Legislature says.

I look FORWARD to robbing you idiots blind, er, doing business with you!

And if you can't come to us?  We'll come to you!  Dial our 800 number.  Well, it's NOT really an 800 number.  After all, my mission is to GET your money, and exploit your fears and paranoia.  Not make it easy for you.

So pay the fee and dial, 223-357-9MM.
Good luck with that.

Boycott Stupid. It's Just A Thought, But Give It Some Thought

"Papa John" is going to add money to your pizza, and lay off employees, cut back the hours of other employees, because, "Obamacare" is going to require that he provide health insurance to his employees.

But he can give away TWO MILLION pizza's, average cost, $10 each in an NFL promotion.

There is a guy named Metz who owns a bunch of Denny's franchises.  Starting in 2014, he's going to add a 5% surcharge to your bill, and he wants you to decide if you want to pay it or tip your waitress 5% LESS to cover the cost of her health insurance that he's going to have to provide.

When I was a kid, your dad (mostly, I'm sure mom's too.  But I have to write the truth as I know it, and my mom didn't work until she had too when I was a teenager) went to work, and your employer paid for your health insurance and promised you a pension, or at least a retirement plan.  So that at some point, you could retire and enjoy the benefits of the Social Security and Medicare you worked your whole life for.

Papa John, and, Mr. Metz are the lowest form of robber baron.  They exploit uneducated, unskilled labor to make billions of dollars, and when asked to take care of their employees like it used to work in this country?  They join the nut job, Bob Murray who's losing money cause coal can't compete with natural gas, and talk about punishing the workers.  In Murray's case?  Flat out laying them off.

What the hell, Bob?  Killing them in coal mine collapses cause you are trying to get every last ounce of coal out of the mountain even though what's left won't hold up the roof isn't enough for you?  I mean, after all.  Bracing to hold up the roof, and equipment are EXPENSIVE!  You lose THAT shit in a mine cave in, you never get it back.  Poor people in rural areas?  A dime a dozen.  Kill ten or twelve of them?  Didn't cost you a cent.

These people are the reason we NEED, Obamacare!  As a matter of fact, they are a perfect example of why we need a national health care plan that all but puts commercial health insurance providers out of business!  It works in every other industrialized country in the world.  It could work here.

And it also should lead to a revitalization of the Labor Movement in this country.  You remember the Labor Movement if you're over 50.  The people who brought you the weekend.  And put an end to company stores.

So, here's my thought on how to have an impact on this kind of exploitation.  Boycott them.

Yeah, I know, there are a lot of folks out there who couldn't make it without the prices they get at Walmart.  I feel your pain, but I understand your situation.

But if you want a pizza?  DON'T buy it from Papa John's (their pizza sucks anyway).  Boycott ALL the Denny's and see how fast the other franchisees put pressure on Metz to shut the fuck up, already!

Find out who you are buying things from that already offer their employees health care coverage, and support them.  I have a friend who works for a Larry Miller dealership and doesn't get health care coverage.  But is wife works for, Smith's and does.

Well, I'll never buy a car from Miller since he sold my Golden Eagles down the road, but his not offering his employees health care just makes that decision that much easier.

I will shop at Smith's.

So let's start here.  Start small, and make a difference.  I don't know if, Pizza Hut offers health care to their employees.  But if enough people start to ask?  They might.  Gotta start somewhere.

Let's just say that I would rather see Papa John's and CIGNA go out of business, than, The Italian Village, and all the other, local, small business' that Mitt Romney and all the other, "Job Creators" (what a bullshit concept!) claim are the backbone of this country.

Just something to think about.

How To Shut Down Arguing About Politics On Facebook

Any one reading this belong to their high school debate club?  You remember the first thing they teach you about debate?  He who asserts must prove.

So when you get into a debate, argument on Facebook and you want to stop it?  Ask for their evidence.  Make them show where they get their, "facts".

And also, ask them for their, "CV".  Most folks just know that, CV means a history of your qualifications.  But it actually means, Curriculua Vitae.  Which means, um.. well?  The history of your qualifications.  I know.  I can hear my friend, Lisa the comedian saying, "That's funny".  Cause it is.

But know this.  If you ask someone for their, "CV" and they look at you like they don't know what you're talking about?  They don't have a CV.

And tonight, I spent too much time arguing with a moron on Facebook.  I asked this guy, who asserted that he knew the human condition and how people thought better than I did.  Despite my Sociology Degree, Minor in Psycohology and 23 years in law enforcement.

But I asked him three times to give me his educational background and tell me what OTHER countries he's visited.  And he wouldn't answer the question.

He just kept quoting the bible.  Which is total fiction.

I have to ask myself why I bother with these people?

So, when you're on Facebook and and you get flustered?  Ask folks for their, "CV".  When they can't answer THAT question?  Quit arguing with them.  They are stupid, and YOU win.

Crapped Out In Las Vegas

I had the most amazing opportunity this last weekend.  And I couldn't enjoy it. 

The way it's supposed to work when you go to Las Vegas for a Jimmy Buffett concert is you get there, drink too much and THEN you get sick.  I got it all backwards.

My friend, Al invited Deb and I to accompany he and his wife to Las Vegas for the Jimmy Buffett show this weekend.  Room, well, "Sky Suite" comped.  Tickets to the show, and yes they WERE on the front row, thank you very much.  Limo ride to and from the show.  All of this should have been the most memorable experience of our lives.  Turns out, Deb had a great time.  Me?  Not so much.

By the time we got to the casino on Thursday afternoon, I didn't feel so good.  I thought I was just stressed out from the drive, the road construction, etc.  I would put my feet up, watch a little college football, have a drink, relax, and then we could go to dinner.  Didn't work out that way.  I just kept feeling worse.

Al and Francis took Deb and went to dinner.  I stayed in the room.  Should have been astute enough to realize I needed water.

I couldn't concentrate well enough to watch a college football game.  That alone, should have been enough to tell me that I was in trouble.  Then, I couldn't concentrate enough to go on Facebook, and read all the goofy political stuff I like.  So went to bed.

These are all the signs of being dehydrated.  Once I started to drink water, I felt better.  But I got no sleep.

I'm sitting in a beautiful suite, overlooking the Las Vegas Strip, or at least part of it.  The lap of luxury, I'm not paying for any of this, and I'm miserable!  And I HAVEN'T been drinking.  In Las Vegas.  How weird is that.

The next morning, after a night of running to the bathroom, cause I'm forcing water, which leads to having to pee all the time, I thought I was feeling better.

We go to the restaurant and I had the most amazing breakfast.  Irish oatmeal, brown sugar, milk and a gorgeous bowl of fresh, beautiful, berries like nothing you have ever seen.  Blueberries, strawberries, blackberries, raspberries.

I had that breakfast for about 15 minutes.  Then without warning, I threw it up all over the gift shop.  Probably the most embarrassing experience I have ever had.  I went to the room as soon as a I could and I was in pretty bad shape.

Francis, the nurse, and Deb, my smart wife, finally figured out I needed to rehydrate.  They brought me Poweraide, and since I needed food, a Powerbar while they went down to the casino to watch Al compete in a slot tournament.

So, I'm in one of the high end casino's on the Vegas Strip, with some of the best restaurant's in the world, and I'm eating like a backpacker.  How screwed up is that?

I did manage to go downstairs that night and eat a few bites of a steak and some salad.  But I was still in the room feeling awful while they were in the casino getting pampered.

That's OK, because I think, Deb had the time of her life.  She never had to pay for a drink, or a meal, and she and Francis had a great time watching, Al win money.

Saturday dawned with no sleep, and feeling miserable.  They went to breakfast, and brought me more Poweraid and let me watch football.  I was really hoping I didn't have to miss this one and only opportunity to catch, Jimmy Buffett from the front row.

I made it, but not by much.  Had we not had the limo?  I really don't think I could have walked across the street to see this.

And this brings up something else I have never experienced before.  When you pull right up to the front door, and get out of a limo?  People look at you funny.  This was my first limo ride, so I've never experienced this.  They kind of look at you like, "Who the fuck are THESE people?"  I don't think I'm anybody special.  But the folks in charge of the place sure treat you like you are.

Then you show the guys in charge your ticket?  And it's Section: FLRC, Row: A, Seat 1?  They treat you real well.  They also put a yellow arm band on you.  Only folks with the yellow arm band are allowed on the front row.  So, you can't, "rush the stage" at THIS show.

Some Asian woman behind me kept asking me, "How you get that!?  Why YOU have that?!  I really didn't know what to say.  But boy, if you don't have that yellow wrist band?  You will get your ass tossed if you try to get on the front row.

The show was awome.  I could look skinny assed, Tina Gulickson right in the eye.  From 100 rows away, she just looked like a skinny girl with a BUNCH of blond hair.  Looks pretty much the same close up!  Deb and Francis got on the, "Crowd Cam". 

And I know why Tina's so skinny.  She and Nadira Shakur do NOT quit dancing the whole show.  Between that workout and the lights?  Wow!  We were UNDER the lights, not IN FRONT of them, and when they turned them all on?  It got HOT in there!

No intermission last night.  Just a long, solid show.  The pretty young girl standing next to Deb caught Jimmy's sweat band at the end of the show.

Al had caught a limo back earlier to see how he did in the slot tournament.  I pulled a muscle in my side trying to yell that information to Francis and Deb while the show was still going on.  And after the show, we went out, and caught another, Aria limo back to the room.

Now it gets weird.  Francis and Deb went down to the casino (since Al plays the high limit slots, all the drinks and food are taken care of, even if they were not playing) so their having the time of their lives, watching the play, eating the food, drinking, and drinking, and drinking the, "boat drinks".

I'm up in the suite, me and my Poweraide, trying to have a glass or two of whiskey, and trying to catch a score for the Utah game on the late, Sportscenter, when my cell phone rings.

Deb says, Al just hit a jackpot for $35K, and I should come down and see this payout.  Yeah.  Yeah, I probably should.  I'd be very happy for him.

But instead, I'm in a Sky Suite, at The Aria, trying to hold one eye open long enough to see if my crappy little football pool picks worked out today.  Cause at he end of the season?  This could bring me in as much as, oh, $300!

I'm really not living life the right way.  But for one brief, and shinning moment?  I got so see what it looks like when you do.

Et Tu, Bill Maher?

Bill Maher is a comedian.  And a very successful, very good one.  One of my favorites.  But he sure stepped on is dick with a post that showed up on Facebook this afternoon.

And I hope he never plays another college campus, as much bad stuff as he said about Campus Police Officers.

I would have thought he was joking, until I read the comments.  So, either most of the other folks who pay attention to his stuff don't get it or I don't. But either way, I can't let him treat an officer involved shooting like Faux News.  By leaving a whole bunch of questions unanswered.  So here goes.

Last week, a Campus Police Officer at The University of South Alabama shot and killed an unarmed, naked freshman, at 01:28 hours in the morning after the young man was banging on (trying to break into?  Maher doesn't say) the police station windows.

According to the police report, the officer encountered a muscular, nude, man, acting erratically.

Being so stoned, or drunk that your think it's a good idea to bang on the windows of, oh, I don't know?  Let's try THE CAMPUS POLICE STATION!  There's a good idea.  I'd call that, "erratic" all right.

He, "repeatedly rushed the officer" according to the report.  Maher's question is, "With what?  His hard on?"  My answer would be, well, maybe that TOO!  But that's not the dangerous part of him.  It's his hands and feet.  He can't hurt you with his dick, unless you're a cherry pie.

According to Maher's post, this lead the Cop to shoot him.  For no good reason.  Accept, as the comedian assumes, the Cop felt, "vaguely threatened."

And this is where the unanswered questions just scream out for answers.  And least to THIS retired, LEO.

First off, just HOW muscular was this kid?  Was he on the schools football team?  A physical specimen that would have been a threat to even more than ONE Cop?

This is the situation where the guy tells all his new friends in jail, "It took six Cops to take me down!"  No, it didn't.  One is all it takes.  We usually used six so we didn't HAVE to shoot you.

The next question that needs to be answered is what is being left out of the part of the report that just says,  "He repeatedly rushed the officer"?

He's my guess, and I'll tell you why I think this.  Every Police Academy in the country teaches, The Force Continuum.  The first level is you presence as a Police Officer.  Secondly is voice commands.  Third is known as, "The laying on of hands".  Where you may have to grab a hold of someone to get them to comply with your commands.  This can involve a hold, a wrist lock, any number of things.  Something as simple as putting your hand on their elbow and guiding them into a chair is part of this.

Now, it gets interesting.  If the bad guy doesn't comply with your efforts, you can move to, "less lethal weapons."  Anything from pepper spray, to a baton, to a bean bag gun.  They are known as, "less lethal" because if you get hit in the head with a bean bag fired from a .12 shotgun?  Might kill you.

No where does any department allow it's officers to go right from feeling threatened by a naked guy, to shooting him.

So, Bill?  You're a great comedian.  But as a journalist?  You suck.

And as for your statement that the guy was probably just some drunk or stoned college student that thought it would be a good idea to and fuck with the Police?  In what world can that POSSIBLY work out for the best?

Yes, Officer, I DO Have A Gun In The Car...

I'm going to get pulled over in Utah County this weekend.  Either on Thursday going South, or on Sunday coming North.

My friend (and yours, Murray folks) Al has invited my wife and I to go with him and his wife to Las Vegas this weekend to see Jimmy Buffett.  He's done quite well over the last few years gambling at the MGM casinos.  And they keep offering him perks to get him to come back, so they can try to win their money back.  They never do.  He's really lucky.

So we're going down there this week, and we have a suite at, The Aria.  Tickets to Jimmy Buffett.  Meals comped, limo ride to the concert.  This is going to be a HUGE experience for me and my wife.  We've never been treated like this before.  So, I told, Al I'd drive.  I don't mind.  Long trips are why I bought the Audi.

But, it's a political season.  And I have, "U of U" license plates on my car.  So most of the time I drive south, I get pushed into the, "boarder patrol" stop in Lehi.  I have to prove I don't have any alcohol or books in the car.  Show them that I AM carrying a handgun.  It gets old.

But this year?  It's going to be a BUNCH of stops.  I have the plates from THE University in Utah.  The one picked for the PAC 12, which rubs those guys down there so raw, they keep chanting, "1984!  1984!..."  Like it will help.

And I have this magnet bumper sticker I bought at the, "Margaritaville Store" in Las Vegas years ago, that I put on the car every year we drive down there.  It's a big margarita glass with the drink spilling out, and it says, in bright red letters, "IT'S MY OWN DAMN FAULT".

But this year?  I have another one on the back of the car.  It's brown, and has a picture of a Black Lab on it.  It says, "DOGS AGAINST ROMNEY: I RIDE INSIDE".

Oh, that's going to piss them off.  Especially since after tonight?  My Labrador would prove to be a better debater than Mitt.

So, I expect that it will take us a LONG time to get south of Utah County on Thursday.  Might be late at night before we get to the casino.

But I have a plan.  I'm going to smuggle a bottle of whiskey INTO Nevada from Utah.  So I don't have to worry if Costco and Trader Joe's are already closed.  Don't tell the Utah County Nazi's.  I'm hiding it in my suitcase.  Right under the extra ammo for the handgun.

Oh, this could be an epic weekend.  I hope to watch, Al hit a, "bigassed" jackpot just to say I've seen it happen one time.

Me?  I've got some cash money American and might take a few chances.  Or not.  I'll let you all know when I'm down there.

Here's Why We Need A National Health Care Plan

I'm sure I'm not the only person my age who has recently become acquainted with a CPAP machine.  For those who don't know, it keeps old, fat guys like me breathing through the night so Sleep Apnea doesn't kill us.  Chances are, if you snore, and you're spouse complains about it, you have Sleep Apnea, too.

And to defend old, fat guys?  I have a friend who runs triathlons, is much younger than me and found himself falling asleep in his car at stop lights during the day.  He's got a CPAP machine now, too.

They have a machine that forces air into your lungs all night and you either have a thing that goes over your nose, or as I do, one that covers your face like a fighter pilot's face mask.  And they have parts, and the parts wear out, and need to be replaced.

But the whole thing is a scam.  Not that Apnea is a scam, it's real.  But the way the home health industry treats you when you have it?  Total scam.

When I was told I needed one of these machines about a year and a half ago, I went to IHC Home Health Care to get one.  I had checked with PEHP, and they said that, yes it was covered, and that they would pay for me to buy one.

But IHC HHC would only RENT me one.  They said that since most people only used it for a few months and then turned it in, the chose to rent them for a YEAR at $80 month, and then if you wanted to keep it?  They would sell it to you.

Nice idea.  You have just made about a thousand dollars extra off a machine that costs about $3K and you haven't even SOLD it yet!  And at the end of the year, you get to sell a USED machine, for full price!  Brilliant!  And insurance companies are OK with this?

I told the guy at IHC that, no, I figured I'd need this thing the rest of my life, and I just wanted to buy it right now, because my PEHP insurance was about to run out, and I wouldn't be able to buy it in a year without buying it all on my own.

He became very flustered.  People in the health care industry, when actually asked qesestions, especially by people who HAVE insurance, who NEVER ask qestions, tend to get fucked up by it.

"No one has ever asked to do this before.  I'll have to go ask my boss about this.  I'll be right back."

No he wouldn't.  After 45 minutes I got up and walked out.  I told the receptionist that she shouldn't keep my appointment open, my salesman now had an, "opening" and I didn't like their customer service.  Time to find a new provider.

Your doctor, when you have a sleep disorder, won't just give you a copy of your diagnosis, and a copy of your prescription for the machine, and the way it should be set up.  You have to go back to his office and have him fax it to who you want to do business with.  Like it's top secret.

Next stop, Apria Health Care that used to be over by Fashion Place Mall.  They were very helpful.  Assured me that they would indeed be happy to NOT rent me the machine and bill my insurance company for the cost to BUY the machine.  They set everything up, gave me the paperwork, sent me on my way and almost immediately, my wife said I was not keeping her up all night with my snoring.  Mission Accomplished.

And then, Apria Health Care sent me a monthly rental bill for eight months.

These bastards will lie through their teeth, and hope you don't notice, and will just pay it.  They have no scruples.

I finally, after numerous calls to PEHP, who swore they were billed for rentals, not a buy had to get ugly with a woman in the Apria office.  I MADE them take me to their billing person.  Took my little note pad and pen, took down her name off of her desk and told her, and you who know me, know what kind of language I used, so I'll spare you here, that if she didn't re-bill this debacle, and get it straight before the next bill came, I would first call, "Get Gephardt" (this was when THAT still meant something) and personally embarrass her and her company, but now that I was going to include her on the lawsuit, she would be liable because it was obvious that she, "knew, or should have known" that there was a problem.

Cleared that shit up right away.

Fast forward to this morning.  I wake up, and the rubber, "gasket" that goes between the hard plastic face mask, and my ACTUAL face, has a hole in it.  It keeps a tight fit on your face, so the air and vaporized water being forced into your lungs ends up there, instead of all over your pillow.  Can't be more than a $5 piece of soft rubber.  So I'll drive over to Apria, and get another one.  Should take about a minute.

Oh, was I wrong.  It appears I don't learn well from my own experience.

First off, the surly receptionist informs me that they can ORDER that part and I will have it in about three days.  Great.  Guess I'll just spent the next three days at Starbucks?  Cause sleep is out of the questions.  I asked her, "What am I supposed to do for three days?  You don't stock these parts in your warehouse?"

She goes into the company spiel, "To stock every little part we would need a huge warehouse (Yeah?  So what?  DO go on!), there are thousands of masks.  Let me see if your eligible for a new mask."

I don't WANT or NEED a new mask!  I need a new, little piece of soft rubber that was made to fit MY mask!  And how do you have available, any size of WHOLE mask, but not the parts to fix ONE that needs some attention?

And she says, "It's going to take an hour to confirm your insurance.  But you are eligible for a new mask."

I asked her, "Then I can take my mask and you'll bill me?"

What was I thinking?  Nope.  I have to make my co-pay before I get a new mask.

Then it hits me.  They don't make much profit on a $5 replacement part.  But if they can bill my insurance for a WHOLE new mask?  Ka-Ching!

You wonder why we have the 37th, "best" health care in the world, and we pay MORE for it than anyone else?  Here's why.  Pay attention.

I went into this place in need of a piece of rubber that couldn't have cost $5.  But because of the way we do business in this country, I walked out of there with a new mask,  just so I could sleep tonight and Apria Health Care had billed my insurance company, $155.30 and gotten a, $38.83 co-pay out of ME!

No problem, Mr. Stickley, we have your credit card on file.  Would you like us to bill it?

THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT!

You think I was better served?  You think I SAVED money?  You think I'm healthier?  You think the replacement part was the problem, and that's really WHY they don't stock them?  Then you think stupid.

This is the equivalent of buying a new SUV because you had a flat tire, or the windshield wipers wore out!

Where have I heard this before?  Oh, yeah.  The Iraq War, where, Halliburton would buy new SUV's for THEIR people for exactly THOSE reasons, because they had a, "Cost Plus" contract.  Meaning they got X amount of money for their services, PLUS the cost of providing them.  No matter how many new, GM SUV's they went through.

And that, boys and girls, it why we don't have a national health care plan in this country.  It would cost rich people too much money!

And Then? The Wheels Came Off...

Mia Love was looking pretty good recently.  One poll actually had her ahead.  She's an attractive, articulate woman.  And her negative ads were just as nasty and hard hitting as Jim Matheson's.

Then?  The wheels came off.

If you are the right wing, Republican, MORMON candidate?  A teabagger to boot.  With a shot at being the first BLACK, MORMON, WOMAN elected to national office from Utah, which would be a total public relations BCS Bowl Game win for the Mormon church (lets face it, their college football team is never, ever going to get one).  And the Mormon's own newspaper's political columnist comes out and calls you a liar?

Someone get that fork out of Mrs. Loves butt cheek.  She's done.

If you think for even a minute, the publishing of Lee Benson's article was not run through the highest channels of Mormonism before it ever saw print?  You don't live in Utah.  Or you're smoking crack.

This was a very carefully timed and calculated move by, The Mormon Church Inc. to keep, Jim Matheson in office.  They might not like everything that he does, but let's face it.  He votes for their interests most of the time.  Which is why I, and every other Democrat in Utah has to hold their nose and vote for him.  We don't have any other choice.

In a year where they have a shot to actually have a Mormon win the White House (won't happen, but they still think it's a possibility), they don't need this distraction, so it's time to put an end to Mia Love's campaign.

A friend of mine said he had looked her up on the Internet and she had run a gym and worked for a call center, but other than that, there was not a lot of information about her.  Well, there is even less now, cause my brief Internet search turned up even less information than that.

She worked as a flight attendant for Continental Airlines after earning a degree from The University of Hartford, according to her campaign site.  But other than that?  Looks like she worked in government in the little, Mormon bunker that is, Saratoga Springs in the west desert, while raising her family.

There is no information about what her husband does, or what other jobs she's had.

Now, having said that?  It could change tomorrow.

But to have, of all people, Lee Benson put the fork in you?  Man, that's got to be tough to take.  It means your own church doesn't want you to distract from the Romney shot at the Presidency.  And it has to hurt that they think you're a distraction from the real goal.  Getting the rich, white, Mormon, Man, and Priesthood holder, elected.

Mia probably doesn't LOVE this.

I went to the link to the article in, Mother Jones and the hate was crazy.  Mormons and Republicans were hating on this venerable news source like you wouldn't believe.  "No one ever heard of that rag until they released the Romney video!"

No, those of us who went to REAL universities started reading it about the time we all were reading, The National Lampoon.  And if I have to tell you about either one of those?  You're really young, or you went to school in Provo.  Hell, even in Murray, The National Lampoon was kept UNDER THE COUNTER at the 7-11.  And you had to go to, Cosmic Airplane or the University Book Store to buy, Mother Jones.

So, good bye, Mia, it's been good to know ya.  But your church decided to sacrifice you, to try to save Romney.

It's not going to work.  But you're still going to be a member.  So they don't really care about you.

Baby, It's Cold Outside

This time of year is tough.  I LOVE the fall.  But this afternoon?  Sitting on the patio with, "The Usual Suspects", smoking cigars, listening to satellite radio and having some adult beverages?  It got COLD!  If you weren't sitting in the sun?  You better have a sweatshirt on.

It's COLD out there!

I'm pretty sure I can turn off the sprinkler system this week.  I have a feeling that the air conditioner will NOT go back on this year.  The leaves in the mountains are turning and falling, but not down here yet.  Should start soon.

And this year?  It seemed to come on so fast!  EJ said it best today, "Three weeks ago we were moving from the shade to the shade on the patio and today?  We're moving into the sun!"  So true.

I need more bird feed tomorrow.  They have been loading up for the long flight south.  Or the long fight this winter when they stay here.  I don't know which.

The snakes have moved in.  I had two in the front yard the other night, and one in the back.  They like to nest for the winter under my front porch that's made of dark colored Trex, and really holds the heat.  And in the back yard, they like to live in the wood pile for the winter.

That's OK, I like having them here.  They eat slugs and snails, and they are harmless, Garter Snakes.  But when you walk out onto your patio, and it seems to be, "moving"?  All I can think of is, Samuel L. Jackson's voice, and it's yelling, "These M*****F******, SNAKES, on this, M*****F****** PATIO!

My daughter won't go out on the patio anymore.  She hates snakes like I hate spiders.

But fall in Utah is changing.  It's not as gradual.  And it's not as soon.  The stuff happening this week, the first week in October?  Used to happen in September when I was a kid.  I remember the earliest snowstorm in the Salt Lake Valley happening on September 17th.  It was back in the 70's, when I was a kid.  I don't remember the exact year.  But I remember it because it happened on my mom's birthday.

Is it global warming?  YES.  Yes it is.  And if we don't do something about it, we're all screwed.

I think what I'll do about it is vote for Democrats, shut off my sprinkler system this week, send my money to politicians who are smarter than anyone running for office in Utah, and only burn my fireplace when...   Oh fuck it.  I'm not giving up the fireplace OR the Camaro.

But I'll keep recycling.  Is that enough?

Keep warm out there.  I shut the fireplace tonight, only to reopen it next weekend while watching college football. 

The times might not be changing?  But the weather is.

Noone WINS A Presidential Debate

Romney did well tonight.  He won the talking points.  He got away with saying we have the best health care system in the world.  He got away with not explaining his REAL tax plan.  He didn't get called on his flip flopping.  And he threw up such a bullshit smokescreen on his REAL plans for Medicare and Medicaid, which the President didn't call him on?  I guess you'd have to say he won THIS debate.

But winning is a hard term to pin down in these things.  And always has been.  Neither candidate really answers the questions.  And they don't punch the other guy in the face when he lies, either.

You think I'm just being a partisan, Obama supporter?  OK, riddle me this?  The whole world KNOWS that Kennedy WON the first televised debate over Nixon because Nixon looked sweaty, and, nervous, and could have used a closer shave.

Name ONE question either guy answered during that debate.  Can't do it?  Not surprised, neither can I.  History remembers the story, but not always the substance.

Gerald Ford flubbed a question about the Soviet Union's influence in Eastern Europe in the 77 election (flubbed it?  Oh, he totally BLEW it) but what did he say that GAVE, Carter the election?  Do you remember?  Bet you don't.

He said there was no Soviet influence in Poland.  I'm pretty sure he meant to say there WAS, but he misspoke.  Remember anything else from that debate?  No?  Figured as much.

The only thing anyone remembers from the Bush/Clinton debate was Bush looking at his watch.  I'd be really surprised if anyone remembers the question being asked when he did that.  I sure as hell don't.

Watching the film, it kind of looks like he did it during the introductions.  I don't remember.

So this whole Presidential debate thing is highly overrated.  Romney did well tonight in that he didn't step on his dick, as he is prone to do.  But as, Steven Colbert said, "Facts tend to have a Liberal bias" and he kept avoiding them.

Until the Republicans quit saying that we have the best health care plan in the world, cause it's such a ridiculous, and horrible lie, they won't really win any debates.  At least not any that there were really judges, scoring them, like in high school debate.

But they can win in a world where more than 47% of the population thinks Faux News is actually, news.  And those dumb asses vote.  And that is the only winning that matters.

And it's a shame.

The Real Reason Mitt Romney Should NOT Be President.

It's not because he's a Republican and I'm a Democrat.  It's not because he's a Mormon.  Every President we've ever had claimed membership in SOME religion.  And from where I stand?  Everyone of them is just as bullshit goofy as the rest of them.

It's because he was a business man, and government cannot be successfully run like a, "business".  If you try it, you get lousy government services.

Romney the businessman thinks in terms of marketing (he's admitted that 47% of the population isn't going to buy what he's selling).  And government isn't about marketing.  It's about providing services to people who sometimes don't want the service, so you help everyone.  Think about prisons and jails as just one example.

MOST of the population in this country will never need to be locked up in a jail or prison.  So, should we, "downsize" this industry?  You could save a lot of money by letting all those murderers and rapists go lose.  After all, then you don't have to feed them, clothe them and treat their medical problems.  That would save TONS of money every year.

Well, we can't do that, so I guess we should look at private prisons.  Ask folks in the south how well THAT has worked out.  The answer is, it hasn't worked out very well.

As a society, we want a safe, effective system of keeping people who would willingly hurt the rest of us, behind bars in a human and responsible manner.  And that cannot be done in the cheapest manner possible, while still being safe and humane.

If you run government the way Romney would have it, the Fire Department would only be open durring the summer, and would be greatly downsized.  After all, in a free market place, if you didn't call in YOUR fire first, too bad.  We're taking care of other customers right now, and your call will be answered in the order it was received.

In Romney world, every citizen would be responsible for taking care of the sidewalk and road in front of his own home.  To have a centralized government do that runs contrary to capitalism.

Look, I want a guy who can run an efficent government that doesn't take all my money in taxes as much as the next guy.  But the truth is, we have a government to do for us what we can't do for ourselves (do you want to have to buy your OWN garbage truck?  Didn't think so).  And this costs money.  It is not free.

Dispite what the NRA wants you to believe, if the Chinese decided they want our land, not just all our money and attack us, you and your friends are not going to keep them from doing it without a strong, centralized, well armed military.  I don't care how good you are with your .22 Long Rifle.

So, lets let the professionals run the government, and Mitt go back to what he does best.  Accuireing companys with other peoples money, loading them with debt, borrowing tons of money on their resources then bankrupting them so he doesn't have to pay back the loans and walking off with a ton of money while putting other people out of work.

Dumb And Dumber

If you are a cheerleader for Mitt Romney and you post it on your FB page?  Good for you.  If I counter your post with the truth, and make you feel bad because I don't agree with you?  I am NOT a bully.  I'm the guy reading the truth while you're watching Faux News.

If you think that everyone who works for a living and belongs to a Union is some how a leech on society, and taking money from you free market folks who hate government regulation?  And I think you're wrong, and I point it out to you right back at you on your page?  I'm not a bully.  I'm telling the truth and you're full of shit.

If you go to the effort to posting a long, impassioned response to something I put in my blog (which means you READ it) and then say, "I don't give a damn about your Liberal bullshit"?  Do I really need to spell this out?  YOU DO, or you WOULDN'T HAVE!  So you're a liar.  And I'm NOT the bully.

Look, if you post stuff on FB, and you really, truly believe it?  That's great.  But when someone doesn't agree with you, or posts a link to something that proves your point to be totally bogus?  You don't get to call them a bully!  Or an asshole, or moron or any other name!  If you're wrong, and you can't prove you're NOT wrong?  You need to shut the fuck up!

I've been called rude, a bully, mean, lacking in social skills and tons of other things in a post on a, "friends" wall this week.  Yet, I'm right, and none of them will defend themselves with facts.  They just blame me for THEM being wrong.  It's laughable.  The dumb never know when to stop.

Yes, I just called all of you folks on Peggy Sue Hickman's WALL dumb!  If the shoe fits.

So, just block me, defriend me, don't read my blog, whatever.  Just stay in your idiot world.

But you can't brand me.  You just show your own idiocy.  Calling me the bully or a moron when I'm smarter than you?  You are way out of line.  But you are a PERFECT REPUBLICAN!

You don't make any money, you don't have any education but you still believe in, "trickle down economics" saving the country.  Moron.  Yes, I called you a name again.  If the shoe fits.

Now, this is going to be interesting.  I can't wait to see how many of Peggy Sue's friends, who claim they don't give a shit about my opinion, can't resist, making a comment about MY OPINION!  This should be priceless.

Let the game begin.

Daytime TV Sucks. But Ridgemont High Stands The Test Of Time

I usually prefer to go do something during the day.  And if the weather's nice, I'll take the satellite radio out on my patio (my back yard is my favorite room in the house) and read.  Or even just watch the birds at the feeders.

But lately, we've had some problems.  Our washing machine has been haunted by gremlins, and the repair guys have now been here four times.  Hopefully they got it fixed.  And I need some work done on the house, so I called my friend, Ralph (R. Clegg Construction 801-550-8596  I've known him for 35 years and he's the best if you need a contractor) and I've had to be in the house where I can hear the doorbell to let people in.  I was bored, so I turned on the TV.

Daytime TV sucks.  Well, unless you like reruns of, COPS and shows about jails.  Then, you got something on all the time.  All the movie channels don't show good stuff, or new stuff during the day.  I even tried to watch GAC (CMT a long time ago fell off the table.  It's not a music channel any more, it's all reruns of shitty shows the company that owns them already paid for) and I don't LIKE MAINSTREAM country music.  But the girls are usually pretty and your attention span only has to last three minutes.  Then you can go get some more iced tea. 

It was so awful after a couple of songs, I couldn't take it.  The formula seems to be, put in a pretty girl, talk about a pickup truck, mention Jesus SOMEHOW, and show an American flag, and the lyrics be damned.  Some idiot will buy it.

As Todd Snyder said, "As long as there's a moron market, and a faggot in a hat to sign..."  I apologize for using, "faggot".  But that's what he wrote, and I want to be accurate.

I prefer Jackson Taylor's take on it in his, Country Song.  The first line is, "This ain't no country song, about your fucking pickup truck, or your grandpappy's farm..."  I will be eternally grateful for Laurie Dyson for turning me on to this guys music.

But I digress.

I finally gave up and was going to go read a book and listen to the satellite radio, which takes a little patience to make work in the house.  When I stumbled on an old movie.  I can't remember the last time I watched, Fast Times At Ridgemont High.  But I still remember some of the lines like it was yesterday.  "Learnin' about Cuba, havein' some food".  "Danger is my business".  "My dad is a TV repairman, he's got this ultimate set of tools.  We can fix it!" 

I have come to the conclusion that you don't have to be in your early 20's, sitting in the theater with your drunken friends, on a Friday night in 1982, for this movie to be funny.

My son was walking back and forth behind the couch, trying to put his work uniform together between the parts in his room, and the parts in the laundry room, and I would hear him stop so he could watch for a minute, and laugh at something.

Him:  "What is this?"

Me:  "An old movie called, Fast Times At Ridgemont High"

"Did you record this?"

"No."

So, I'm pretty sure he's going to be looking for this.  And when he watches it, he's going to have some questions.  He won't understand the, "Mall Culture".  When he and his friends go to the mall, it's not to hang out, it's to actually buy stuff.  He won't know what a video arcade is.  He's going to wonder why no one has a cell phone, or computer and he won't understand the concept of a pay phone.  I'm going to have to explain Demone's ticket scalping to him.  You want tickets?  You buy them on line.  And when, Stacie takes, Rat into her room after their first date to look at pictures in a photo album?  That will not compute.  You keep pictures on your PHONE!

This will be as foreign a concept to him as black and white TV.

I hope he will sit down and watch it with me.  After seeing it again, I'd watch it one more time just to explain what it was like in, "Dark Ages" before computers, email, cell phones, and video games that actually came home with you and didn't take all your quarters.

And Phoebe Cates and Jennifer Jason Leigh were awesome.  THAT is what beautiful looked like in 1982.

It was a nice trip down memory lane.

Maybe tomorrow, I'll wait for Ralph while watching a DVD of, Dazed And Confused.

Reallly? Airplane Windows Should Roll Down? REALLY?

OK, I thought this was a joke.  I thought it had to be something from, "The Onion".  Mitt Romney wondered, out loud, why his wife couldn't roll down her airplane window when her plane had to make an emergency landing.  After all, there was NO OTHER SOURCE OF OXYGEN in the cabin.

Except for the, pressurization, that keeps OXYGEN in the cabin.

I found three different sources for this story, but I still hope it's wrong or a hoax.  Because I can't believe that someone who is running for President of this country, as the candidate of one of the two major parties, and went to school at Stanford, could actually say this.

I'm not an engineer.  And I'm no scientist.  But I've been flying on airplanes since I was about three years old.  And my father?  Well, when someones not smart, they say, "He's no rocket scientist".  He WAS a rocket scientist.  So I could pretty much ask him anything, and get a good answer.

You put a hole, even a little one, in the outside of an airliner at 36K feet in the air, and pretty soon?  You have a, "fart tube" that collapses like a submarine when it goes too deep.  Don't worry about the fall killing you.  The -60 degree temperature and lack of oxygen will do you in LONG before you hit the ground.

This is why you have to take an FAA approved class to do extraditions, and carry your handgun on an airplane.  Even an Air Marshall knows that actually USING a handgun on an airplane, while it's in the air?  Is the absolute, last resort to keeping it from being hijacked.

Hell, if they want to hijack it and LAND it somewhere?  Let em do it.  Shoot em when you're on the ground.  But you can't always be sure of that, I know.

If the man who wants to be the leader of the free world, doesn't understand why there is no crank on his airplane window?  He is not smart enough to be the leader of the free world.  End of story.

I'm Going To Jail On Sunday.

For 20+ years, I was in and out of jails all over the country.  I never used the front door.

I was always coming in the back.  In a Cop car.  Gun on hip, badge in pocket.  It was always pick up or delivery with me.  Mostly delivery.  Put the gun in the trunk, take the, "bandit" inside, drop him off, head back out to the streets.

But I picked up, too.  I used to take any extradition that no one else wanted in the office.  I had my caseload up to date, I could leave for a day or two or three and still not get behind.  I would travel with my friends, while getting paid for 12 hour days, mostly spent on airplanes.  And when we got where we were going, have a great meal, stay in a nice hotel and I got to keep the Delta Skymiles.  The state always booked us on Delta.

I picked up bandits in Gainsville, Florida;  Charlivoux, Michigan; Phoenix;  San Francisco;  Southern Illinois (don't even remember the name of the little town);  St. Louis;  Reno; Sacramento;  Las Vegas (MANY times); Elko; Evanston, Wyoming;  Gunnison, Colorado;  Chicago;  and, believe it or not, Buffalo, Wyoming.  It's 112 miles north of Casper, Wyoming.

My parolee said it was the best jail he'd ever been in.  The Sheriff's wife did all the cooking for the 12 inmates, and the food was awesome.  And on top of that?  He got a pack of cigarettes and a role of toilet paper, every other day.

THAT is Parolee Heaven!

All jails smell the same (it's NOT pleasant) and look, pretty much the same, too.  And I always went in the back door.  And out the back door.

Not on Sunday.  I am going to walk in the front door of the Salt Lake County Adult Detention Center to tell my wife's nephew that his grandmother is dead.  And it's not going to be a pleasant experience.

They need us to arrive 45 minutes early.  They will check our IDs, run us for warrants, search us for weapons and then let us in for a 30 minute visit.  I hope it's face to face and not through the glass.  For my nephew's sake.  He's always been close to his Aunt Debbie.

Not me so much, but he has done me some favors.  I won't tell you his name or what favors.  I don't want him to get shanked if he ends up back inside again.

So this is going to be an experience I've never had before.  I'm going into a jail as a civilian.  At least I'm not going in the back door as a bandit.

Hypocrisy And Republicans

The Utah Legislature, both houses, controlled by Republicans have in the last few years, tried to take, "back" all the Federal Land in Utah.  That they never owned in the first place.  Declared that they would NOT honor, Obamacare in the state.  Tried to pass unconstitutional, antiabortion laws.  Decided that they didn't want to honor Federal education laws, including the No Child Left Behind mess that was pushed by George W. Bush.  Tried to exempt themselves form Federal gun laws.  Fought the EPA and the endangered species act.  They HATE Federal intervention into anything they want to do as a state. 

They have stated many, many times that the Federal Government has overstepped it's authority in Utah, and they need to back off.  We don't need the Fed's telling us what to do!

And yet, time and time again, Governor Gary Herbert has asked for Federal Funding for disaster relief!  In Cache County, In Washington County and just today, in Washington County AGAIN!

With the corruption that has come to light in his administration in the Department of Corrections, DABC, UTA, UDOT how does this ass clown expect to get re-elected?  He's a total failure as a Governor. He's totally dropped the ball.  He's an IDIOT!

Oh, I forgot.  He's a Mormon, without a college degree, and he runs as a Republican.  He's a shoe in in this dumb ass state.  He can't lose.  Even though he's a moron.

$13 Million pay off for giving his buddy a contract in the UDOT scandal?  How is he still in charge?

But, if things get ugly?  We WILL take the Federal money.

Hypocrite.

You folks who are not rich and want to vote for Mitt Romney?  This is the kind of Government you will get, on a nation wide level if you do.  It will be the end of the country we love.

I'm The 47%. And I'm Richer Than YOU! Pay Attention.

More than 30 years ago, my wife and I both took jobs with the State of Utah.  We took them because they promised a living, not a great one, but a good one.  And if we worked for the good people of the State of Utah for, at the time, 30 years, we would get 60% or our income in a pension every month, and lifetime health insurance.  PEHP, Public Employees Health Plan.

Well, turns out the State of Utah lied to us.  In 2006, Governor John Huntsman signed into law HB213 that took AWAY my retirement health care.  After all, you have to run government like a business, don't you?

No.  It's totally different.  But you have to work in it to understand that.

But, like in business?  They kept that health care for anyone who had served in the Legislature for 10 years.  For life.  I spent 23 years in the states trailer parks, jails, prisons, and meth labs, and I got FIVE YEARS of paid health insurance.

The time in the meth labs?  Gave me bladder cancer.  But not insurance to cover it.

In the thirty years my wife and I worked for the State of Utah, we found out my wife has RP and is losing her sight.  She had to go on disability in 1995.  So she is on Social Security and Medicare.  We had a daughter who is Autistic.  She can't work.  She is on Social Security Disability and Medicare, cause other wise, with out my promised, but later taken away medical insurance, no one would cover her.

So, I have a GOVERNMENT pension.  My wife has one too.  And Social Security disability.  As does my daughter.  And my son gets some money too, since his mom is disabled.

This is a pretty good country that pays you for working FOR it even when working for it fucks you up.  Would you have it any other way?  Would you like everyone who has a hard luck story to just have to stand at the exit to Walmart and BEG to be taken care of?

Mitt Romney does.  I might be one of the 47%  who takes money from the government.  But he's part of the 1% that doesn't want to pay taxes to support the government he benefits from!

This guy is a total prick!  And if you work for, and receive a pay check?  And you vote for HIM?  You're nuts.

My friend, Barb Guy who Deb and I met on our first trip to Cuba posted a quote from, Politico tonight, and I think it's right.  "Mitt Romney's campaign is SO dead, the Mormons have already baptised it."

I hope she's right.

The Big East. Oh, The Horror...

Watching he Big East Commissioner try to argue that they were still a viable league tonight on the, "shit storm" that was the Rutgers v. South Florida football game was pitiful. I felt sorry for the guy.  But only for a second.

That league has SUCKED for SO long, that I feel no remorse at their eminent demise.  And they, because of the TVs they commanded, kept their BCS automatic qualification for so many years when the only teams that had a prayer of playing for a mythical National Championship were West Virginia and Pitt.  And Pitt sucks so bad this year they lost to Youngstown State!  Hell they sucked the year the Utes clobbered them in the Fiesta Bowl.

So, here's how I see things breaking down in the next few years.

Notre Dame goes to the ACC, full time.  Yes, in football too.  It won't take them long to figure out that winning the ACC, which is not a very tough football conference (Duke?  Wake Forrest?  North Carolina?  Maryland?) and getting into a BCS Bowl Game is a LOT easier than playing the, Murderer's Row of a schedule they play now, which this year includes, Michigan State, Michigan, Miami, Stanford and USC, and having to do well enough to finish 6th or higher in the polls at the end of the season.

Let's face it, once you get past Florida State and Clemson, there is not ONE school in that whole conference who's a threat every year, after year, after year, to get a shot at a national championship.

I'm talking to you, Georgia Tech.  You got, "Bitch Slapped" by Utah in two Bowl Games in the last six years.

The Big East is about to implode.  They are picking up Memphis, Houston, SMU, Navy and UFC for crying out loud!  When you read this, how many of you know what city in Florida, the University of Central Florida is in?  There are football fans IN Florida who don't.

And they are taking Boise State and San Diego State for football only.  And I think BYU needs to make a move RIGHT now to get in on this.  Trust me, Zoobies, this is your only hope.

You have to throw your rope to the Big East, for football only like the other western schools.  After all you already have a conference affiliation for all your other sports with those high school gym sized schools in, what is it called?  The Jesus Conference?

And hope they take you, just cause they are in such bad shape right now, that they will take anyone with a stadium, and TV market bigger than a school from the MAC!  Oh, wait.  They took, Temple back after kicking them out years ago.  So I might be wrong.

You might get passed over for Central Michigan.  They have the Saginaw/Bay City/Midland tri-city TV market.  Just sayin...  All you REALLY have is Provo and South Jordan.

But you gotta remember that you have to give up your revenue from that lucrative, BYUTV thing.  After all, I know you're getting rich with all those food storage ads, but still.  The rest of the league isn't going to let you keep THAT without sharing.

And for the few years this league stays in operation, very few, you better win it a couple of times.  Because when it dies, and it will, you better hope you're in a place to get invited to a BCS AQ conference.

But you won't be.  You will be cast adrift in the college football world, because no one wants a cranky, self indulgent, self important, religious school.  The Big 12 already has one in Baylor.  And if DEMOCRAT, Ann Richards hadn't threatened to kill the deal when she was Governor of Texas and the SWC broke up?  Baylor wouldn't be in.

She went to Baylor.  The Southern Baptist "University".

You might have to beg to get back into the Mountain West Conference.  But I don't think they will have you.  You might get a shot at Conference USA.  They HAD religious schools, but TCU went to the Big 12, and SMU is going to the Big East.

I think they are the ones to get the automatic qualifier to the BCS when the Big East falls apart.  But if they do?  They will be the lowest rated conference with AQ.  So you will be playing the guys you wish you were for the last ten years.

The BCS Busters.  Good luck with that.

Don't YOU DARE Talk Bad About Mitt Romney In Utah. Even If I Did It First

Tonight, on Facebook, an old friend of mine posted that she wishes people would quit judging Mitt Romney based on his religion and politics.

Well, she's half right.  You SHOULD judge a politician on his politics.  As for his religion?  I would judge them on that, but you might not want to if you, yourself HAVE a religion.  I would judge you poorly if you DO have one.  But that's a whole other blog.

My response was that I didn't think that was the only reason people judge Mitt poorly.  That it might have something to do with his putting his foot in his mouth and his dog on his roof, that lead people to question his character.  And that he was not able to relate to the regular folks, the ones who didn't have, "car elevators" that put him at a disadvantage.

Oh man.  Batten down the hatches!

I was told by, and I have to assume a relative, only because the last name was the same, that this person was NOT going to debate politics of FB and that I was pretty much going to lose all my friends (on FB, I took her to mean, but she could have meant in life, too) for being a jerk!
Well, that last part might be true.  But I had NO intention of starting a political argument.  I was just making conversation!

Then everyone else chimed in.  I was getting pummeled with video links to Romney speeches, and stuff he said today, and even stuff President Obama said, that had NOTHING to do with what we were talking about!

Man, I guess you better not criticize, "The Mittster" in Utah!

Look.  I make no bones about my political stance.  I'm a Liberal because I have a college education and I learned HOW to think, and not WHAT to think.  I don't take my orders from some guy who lives in the sky.  And doesn't exist.  I don't believe some fiction from hundreds of years ago should tell me who should love each other.  And I sure don't believe it should tell my GOVERNMENT how to run things.

But I did not try to pick a fight.  I just MADE, A, COMMENT, ON, A, FRIENDS, POST, ON, FACEBOOK!

I feel I should quote the, "Holy Movie", Stripes, here.  "Lighten up, Francis."

I won't vote for Mitt because I'm a Democrat and he's a Republican.  End of story.

But the rest of the story?  I don't think I want a Mormon running the country, and I MARRIED one!  I used to play hockey with a guy who owned all the Hardee's stores in Utah.  And he used to complain that the guys he hired with BYU MB A's to run his stores, couldn't think for themselves.  They couldn't solve a problem if it wasn't addressed in the manual.  They can't think for themselves.  They were taught WHAT to think, not HOW to think.  That disturbs me.  What if Mitt is like that and things fall to shit?

I don't want a guy who made millions in American using our system to his advantage, who then sent his money to The Caymans and Switzerland so he didn't have to pay taxes on it, to be President.  I think that is a chicken shit move.

I don't have a problem with a rich guy being President.  All of our Presidents were.  But this guy seems SO out of touch with reality.  Car Elevators?  Really?  Cadillacs on BOTH coasts?  Wow.  I'm pretty rich myself.  I drive an Audi and a new Camaro, but I don't need an elevator to move cars around my house.  I just have to wake up my teenage son and tell him to move my old truck I gave him so I can get the Camaro out of the, "Garage Ma Hall" in the back of the house.

So, no, I won't vote for Mitt.  Because of his dog on his roof, and his foot in his mouth, ("Corporations are people, my friend!") among other reasons. 

His religion is WAY down on the list for me.  And a lot of other people.  So lighten up, Utah.

Real, 9-11 Vs. Political 9-11

I had worked late the night before.  Out chasing bandits.  We had only been in this house a month.  Still kind of settling in.  The kids were in school LONG before I woke up.

By the time I woke up, Deb said her sister, Sandy had called her and said a plane ran into the World Trade Center.  Wow!  Turn on CNN.  I'm sitting there in my bathrobe, watching this when it happens again.

Well THAT, can't be a coincidence.

So at this point, I figure I probably better go to work, cause some weird shit is happening.  But I had NO idea how weird it was going to get.  And how weird folks in SLC were going to get about it.

I took my time, don't get me wrong.  Long shower.  Had some breakfast.

But instead of the usual Levis and Polo shirt with the department badge embroidered on the front, I picked the shirt with, "POLICE" on the back, and wore the bullet, "resistant" underwear under it, and the gun BELT instead of the shoulder holster I would cover in a restaurant or court room.

I had no idea what I was walking into at the office.

If you know nothing about Mormons?  Know this.  They think they are the center of the entire UNIVERSE!  I got to the office just in time to be called, as an FTO, into a meeting with the powers that be in the office, who were, and I shit you not, discussing how we could help in the aftermath of a terrorist attack on Salt Lake City.

They decided that the metal detector that was in the hallway where we lead probationers/parolees into the meeting rooms, should be moved to the front door.  After all, we don't want a terrorist bomb getting inside the building.

Bullshit.

I guess I should explain who the guy in charge of our office was at the time.  It was Phil Kirk.  His previous job was as a motorcycle Cop for Salt Lake City and he wrote traffic tickets for them for a while, then he married, Nadine Whimmer from KSL, became SLCPD's, Public Information Officer.

Damn, he was a good looking Mormon who was on TV ALL the time.

The problem with him was?  The only thing sharp about him was his suits.  He's as dumb as the day is long.  And when his buddy, "Mr. Potato Head" who was in charge of Corrections at the time made him the boss in our office?  He was in WAY over his head.  He had no idea what Adult Probation and Parole did.

I have FORGOTTEN more about Corrections, than Phil Kirk ever knew.

So the morning of 9-11, Phil Kirk was in the, "Well, they attacked New York and went after Washington DC.  Salt Lake City MUST be next!  We need to prepare!" mode.

Yep, lets lock down everything, and I'll shoot a 747 our of the air before it crashes in to, The Temple, as that's their next LOGICAL target, with my .40 Calibre Glock.

This guy was totally delusional.

Everyone knows the rest of the story.  "W" used it as an excuse to attack a country that didn't attack us, but had LOTS of oil.  We didn't learn anything from the Russians spending 10 years in Afghanistan, and we are still there.  The, "Molympics" went off without a hitch cause of all the Federal Money spent on law enforcement.

I spent two months teaching FBI Agents from Florida how to pull off their gloves with their teeth and draw a gun from under a coat.  But the overtime the FBI paid me paid off my truck.

So today, I think about and honor the 263 brothers and sisters behind the badge that died that day.  And all the regular folks who did.  I won't forget.

But I won't get fooled again, either.

Defriended Again! Dag Nab It! I'm So Hurt! NOT!

A few weeks ago, I became Facebook friends with an old friend.  A guy I've known since I was a kid.  Turns out he and and all his friends are right wing, wackaloon, nut balls!  Who knew.

So the last couple of nights, we've been having, well, I won't call it a debate, cause they bring no facts to the table.  I guess you would have to call it a political discussion.  I mean, if his friends think the faults of the, "W" administration are the fault of the Clinton administration, the deficit and budget problems are all Obama's fault, the stimulus DIDN'T work, think we have the best health care system in the world, and people from all over are jealous of our system, and that MORE guns will solve the gun violence problem in this country?  Well, it's not really a debate.  It's my talking sense to a bunch of mashed potato's.

I don't mind that.  I know I'm not going to change these people's mind.  No matter how many times I hit them over the head with the truth.  Cause they don't want to hear it.  It contradicts their world view, so they struggle against it.

But the problem is, when they defriend you?  You don't get to respond to their last shot at you.  That bugs me.  I don't mind being defriended, or even blocked.  Doesn't hurt my feelings.  But not getting to respond to your total bullshit post to my truth?  That is NOT right.

So to all of Rich's friends,(like any of them would read this?  Never happen, just needs to be said), here goes.

To the guy who read my bio on Facebook?  Good for you for doing your research.  But no, I didn't retire on disability at 47.  I retired on my retirement I earned after 23 years in law enforcement.

And the big assed portfolio my father the rocket scientist left me.  And my wife who is blind, and my daughter who is Autistic and disabled, DISABILITY.  Social Security is a great thing.  And unless you intend to NOT take yours when you get to 65?  Shut the fuck up.

But you didn't do ALL your homework.  When I said I think Ed Abbey is a genius, you said, "He's an Eco terrorist" cause it fits what you want to say.  No, he's not.  He wrote a BOOK about Eco terrorists, called, The Monkey Wrench Gang.  But since you don't read BOOKS, and I don't have time to explain them to you, I'll forgive that mistake.

Ed Abbey was an English Professor at The University of Arizona in Tucson.  He was a passionate environmentalist, which is why YOU think he was an Eco-terrorist.  He had a view DIFFERENT from yours.

And to the woman who told me to watch my mouth?  Fuck you. I'll say what ever I want.  In any forum I want.  Because of the First Amendment of The Constitution you think was, "Divinely Inspired" by your imaginary friend who lives in the sky.

And to the woman who thinks it's dangerous that I describe myself as, "a heavily armed Democrat" who likes guns and has a bunch of them?  Are you fucking kidding me?  You nut balls bring assault rifles to President Obama's speeches and I'M the guy who makes you nervous?   Cause you cuss me out for having a better education than you and having traveled the world?  You want to take MY guns away cause I disagree with your political beliefs, but if Democrats want some gun control?  WE'RE the Communists?

Good.  Good thing my old friend, well, "FORMER" friend, Rich defriended me.  I don't want to be friends with anyone this stupid and his stupid friends.  I just wish I'd had a shot to get in a last word.  But it would have been fruitless, so I guess it's a moot point.

The sad part is they all DON'T answer questions when you ask them.  Do you have a college degree and from where?  Nothing.  Do you work for a government Agency like a Police or Fire Department and you hate the government and taxes?  Nothing.  Did you go to a public school?  Nothing.  Do you use public roads, bridges or, The Post Office?  Nothing.  Does your employer pay you what you're worth and do you have health insurance?  Nothing.

They just say shit like, "Well you and your high fallootin' COLLEGE degree and all the places you have traveled don't mean anything to me!  You just don't know how AMERICA works!  Cause you're ignorant, and you don't listen to the truth (as told by Faux News and Rich Lowrey)!"

You can't argue with people like that, so I'm going to quit.  As Ron White says, "You can't fix, stupid."  He's right.

Aloha Welker DeYoung Is About To Die.

I met my wife in a bar.  With a bunch of friends from Youth Corrections and The Juvenile Court.  I didn't know her background until after we started to date.

We got together every other Friday, Payday Friday at, David's Uptown on Main.  We called it, "The Weekend Attitude Readjustment Seminar".

And I didn't meet her parents until we got married.  They still lived in California.

When we went down there a month or so after getting married, we stayed at their house, and they had a reception for us.  Her dad and I played golf.  He kept telling me it was OK if I had a beer.  Truth be known, I usually prefer ice tea when golfing, and that's what I drank.

But her mother was, after asking one of her sisters when we started dating if I was a Mormon, totally accepting of her Gentile son in law.

She was nothing but wonderful to me, and our children.  She was the most loving, and accepting person I have ever known.  She loved her Gay grandson with no reservation.  She could find no fault with anyone.  Unless they didn't like the Utah Jazz or the San Francisco 49's.

She even rooted for the Utes since I went there.  I'm not sure it made my wife, the BYU graduate happy, but she lived with it.

She was told for the last 40 years that all the cancer and other problems were going to kill her.  She might have said it much more nicely than I will, but she pretty much told, Death to, "fuck off!" for that entire time, and continued to live.  Despite all the doctors that said she would not.

She was the anchor for her whole family.  All her kids and all THEIR kids.  The could always count on Grandma DeYoung.  She was the rock.

Now?  Not so much.  She's, "circling the drain", and it's not a pretty sight.  But it's not her fault.  She's 89 years old.

Deb says that earlier tonight, she tried to pull of her colostomy bag, and wanted to go for a walk.  She hasn't walked in at least a year.  So this is no way for a wonderful woman to go out.  On drugs and not knowing what's going on.  I'm glad I got to talk to her again this afternoon, even if only for a minute before she faded out again.

She is absolutely convinced that there is an after life.  And that as soon as she goes, she is going to be reunited with her husband, and she can't wait for that.  She's missed him the last few years.  She wants to be with him again.

And I hope she's right.

And I want her to do that.  Because this life is long and painful sometimes.  And sometimes?  We live too long.

I'm going to miss you, Mom.  You were wonderful to me.  I love you so much.  Thank you for being so accepting of me, and my ways, that were so different from yours.  You never questioned, you never scolded.  You just accepted.  And loved.

Have a good trip.  We're all going to miss you.  And never, ever forget you.

I'll be happy to write a serious obituary for you, leaving out my opinion.  But I just had to say what I was thinking.  Not everyone can say they love their Mother In Law.  I sure did.